


In Victory, Solitude

by Accel



Category: Ultraman Ginga S, ウルトラシリーズ | Ultra Series
Genre: Discussion of Death, Mild Sexual Content, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-16
Updated: 2015-11-16
Packaged: 2018-05-01 23:31:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,079
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5225333
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Accel/pseuds/Accel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Shou needs to stop yearning for someone who seems pretty determined to not exchange a single word with him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In Victory, Solitude

**Author's Note:**

> This is technically canon divergent, but you can squeeze it into canon if you overlook it not treating Victory like a character.

Shou set the Victory Lancer down on the table and frowned at it. He gently touched the likeness of Victory’s face with a finger.

“I…” Shou said, trailing off. “I want to know who you are,” he tried again, choosing each word carefully. As expected, he was met with silence. He sighed with frustration and stood up, tucking the Lancer back into his pocket. As much as he wanted to, he couldn't force Victory to talk to him. 

 

* * *

The door opened a few seconds after Shou rang the doorbell.

“Hello, Shou!” Hikaru said, bowing his head slightly. Shou bowed back. There was a wide smile on Hikaru’s face. “Glad you decided to visit!”

“I had business on the surface, and your place was close by,” Shou said. The ‘business’ was him going to the library and spending a few hours there reading. The information Kisara had given him about the surface was outdated in areas such as technology and society, so learning as much as he could was a priority. He was also finding fiction written by surface dwellers to be rather fascinating, if confusing. Their civilisations might exist on the same planet, but the surface might as well be inhabited by aliens from a far flung corner of the universe, for how much Shou understood them.

Hikaru nodded emphatically. “I see. Well, come in!” he said, stepping back and letting Shou enter the apartment. Shou took his shoes off (learning about Japanese etiquette had been one of the first things he’d done at the library), setting them down beside Hikaru’s, and walked further into the apartment. He reached into his pocket to take out the gift he’d brought for Hikaru, but froze when he saw Ginga and Taro sitting at the kitchen table.

“You’ve got it wrong, Taro,” Ginga said patiently. They and Taro had somehow gone from being as tall as a building to the size of an average human.

“No, _you’ve_ got it wrong!” Taro said, pouting and crossing their arms.

“Ultras can do that?!” Shou managed to say, trying not to gape like a fish.

Ginga turned to look at him and smiled. “Hello, Shou. We can shrink to the size of humans, but we don’t usually have a cause to do so. We’d draw too much attention if we walked around like this.”

“I told them they’re free to hang out here,” Hikaru said, clapping a hand on Ginga’s shoulder. “I figured it must kinda suck being stuck in an inanimate object all the time.”

“I wouldn’t say it’s a bad experience, but being able to stretch our legs is nice,” Taro said.

While the others were talking, Shou had spent a minute staring at Taro’s horns before his gaze was drawn to Ginga. His eyes lingered on their cheekbones and the silver lines running all over their arms and chest. Ginga was an alien, but Shou couldn’t help thinking they were…entrancing.

Hikaru clapped his hands together. “Well, now that you’re here, Shou, how about we…play a game! You’ve never played video games, right?”

Shou blinked, coming out of his reverie. “I don’t think so,” he said, scrunching his eyebrows together.

“Video games are a wonderful human invention!” Taro said excitedly. “Let’s play Super Smash Brothers! Or maybe Mario Kart…”

“We’ll show you how to play, Shou. It’s fun,” Ginga said.

Shou quickly discovered that video games utilised surface technology, and that there was in fact something similar to it in Victorian society. At first, he felt clumsy fumbling with the plastic object he was meant to hold in order to play the game. It was vastly different to the mental controls Victorian games had. But the other three were helpful and encouraging, and soon he was paying more attention to the game than anything else.

A few hours later, Shou was cramming chocolate into his mouth while he watched the others play. Taro and Hikaru were rather animated, occasionally elbowing each other, while Ginga was more calmer. Hikaru eventually got up, came over to the kitchen, and started rummaging through the pantry. 

“I’m starving!” Hikaru said. “Ginga and Taro are tough competition. And you’re doing pretty well, newbie.”

Shou snorted. “I’m not _that_ new to this. Victorians have games like these, too.”

“Taro still kicked your ass last round, though,” Hikaru said, snickering.

Shou frowned and crossed his arms. He’d tasted defeat, but he’d get Taro back next time. Hikaru threw some snacks onto the table, and oh, that’s right. Shou had almost forgotten. He took out Hikaru’s gift and held it out to him. he'd seen Hikaru eating these sweets before, so he’d figured giving these to him was a safe bet. “This is for you. For me visiting,” Shou said, a little stiffly. 

“Oh, thank you!” Hikaru said, taking it and beaming at him. He sat down next to Shou, and Shou tried not to act _too_ pleased when he was offered another chocolate bar. He was never going to admit that he’d taken an immense liking to this particular surface food. They chatted for a while about mundane things (well, as mundane as you could get for an exchange between a surface dweller and a Victorian), and then the conversation turned to the resident aliens.

“It’s…odd, seeing those two here,” Shou said, casting a brief look over his shoulder. Taro and Ginga were currently arguing about which was the best character in Super Smash Brothers.

“I found it weird at first, too,” Hikaru said, laughing a little. “But I got used to it. It’s nice not having to live alone. Maybe you could tell Victory it’s alright to come out of the Lancer once in a while?”

Shou looked down at the table. “I can’t. They…They don’t talk to me.” He was suddenly very conscious of the Lancer in his pocket.

“What, never?” Hikaru said, looking shocked.

“Never,” Shou said. He gritted his teeth together. “I don’t know why.”

A loud sound from the other side of the room made both of them jump.

“Taro…” Ginga sighed.

“I’m sorry!” Taro wailed. “I think I can fix it, just let me…”

“Aw man, Taro! We’ll talk about this after, ‘k?” Hikaru said, giving Shou a concerned look before going to investigate what had happened. Shou didn’t know how to feel about confiding in Hikaru about this. He hadn’t intended on letting this become an issue, and yet, here he was, wishing he could sit next to Victory and play video games with them.

Ginga sat down in the seat Hikaru had occupied and watched Shou half-heartedly finish eating his chocolate. “I’m sure that Victory is listening to you,” Ginga said, after a minute.

Shou couldn’t look at Ginga. “Really? Well, it sure doesn’t feel like it,” he said tightly.

“I’m sure they have their reasons,” Ginga said. They looked a little sad. “Just…keep trying. I’m sorry I can’t be of much help. Victory won’t talk to me either.”

“You don’t have to be sorry. This doesn’t have to do with you,” Shou said, sighing.

Shou jerked in surprise when Ginga gently placed their hand over his. “It doesn’t, but I’m concerned for you. The bond between an Ultra and a host should be something _good_ , not something that causes you conflict.”

Shou looked at the hand covering his, and then at Ginga. “Thank you for your concern,” he mumbled. Ginga smiled, and Shou felt his breath catch in his throat. He tentatively reached his hand out to them. “Can I…?” Shou said, feeling his heart beat faster. It was silly to be nervous, he told himself. But it felt like he was on the brink of something as he reached out to touch this achingly beautiful alien being.

Ginga nodded, and Shou placed his hand on the area between their neck and shoulder. They felt warm, and soft. He dragged his hand down, fingers lightly brushing against the blue crystal. Just before he could touch the glowing round object in the middle of Ginga’s chest, he heard a loud bang. Shou jerked his hand away violently.

“You did it, Taro!” Hikaru cheered.

Ginga withdrew their hand and said, “Let’s get back to the game.” Shou felt a pang of disappointment that whatever moment they’d had was now over. “I’ll go easy on you, if you want,” Ginga said, a mischievous smile on their face.

“No way!” Shou said indignantly. “Bring it. I’m gonna take you down.”

 

* * *

Before Shou left Hikaru’s place, he’d had a brief discussion with the others about his situation with Victory. He'd felt a little awkward about it. Taro had hemmed and hawed, saying that the Ultras they knew who’d taken hosts were always communicative. Hikaru echoed Ginga, saying that he should keep trying to talk to Victory.

“And you can talk to us about this, if you want,” Hikaru said.

“You don’t have to—” Shou started, but Hikaru interrupted him. 

“It’s okay, man, really. It’s bothering you, and I don’t wanna see you keeping this all to yourself.”

That night, Shou couldn’t help replaying the events of the day again in his mind. The video games _had_ been fun, and he wouldn’t be opposed to spending another day like that. His thoughts wandered to Ginga, remembering how their skin had felt softer than he’d expected it to be. He wondered if Victory’s skin would feel the same way. He wondered how Victory would taste if he kissed them—

Shou threw the covers back and grabbed the Victory Lancer off the bedside table. “I know you’re there,” he said, the words tumbling messily out of him. “We’re partners, aren’t we? When we fight together, I can feel you there, but why don’t you let me reach you? Why—” His voice cracked, and he had to stop for a minute.

“I want to see you. I want to hear you,” Shou said. I want to touch you, he thought, so much. “Please,” he whispered.

Silence was all he got in response. Shou bowed his head and gripped the Lancer so hard he almost thought it would break. He didn’t know how long he sat there in the dark, wanting so desperately it hurt.

 

* * *

Shou awoke with a start, and immediately sensed that he wasn’t alone. He turned the lamp on with a mental tap, and his heart stopped when he saw Victory sitting at the end of the bed, back turned to him.

“Victory,” he said, the word sounding like it’d been dragged out of the depths of him.

_I’m sorry, Shou,_ he hears in his mind. Victory was as still as a statue. _I haven’t talked to anyone in a very long time._

Shou was suddenly furious. “Being sorry doesn’t get us anywhere! Why the hell didn’t you talk to me earli—” He let out a shuddering gasp as Victory, at long last, lowered the barrier separating them. His mind was flooded with thoughts, emotions, memories, _Victory_. Permeated through all of it was a sorrow that felt as old as the Earth itself. Memories of friends, partners, and lovers, lost to violence and buried beneath the sands of time, flickered through Shou’s mind.

_I couldn’t protect them,_ Victory said, every word weighed down with heavy finality.

“You’re not going to lose me like that,” Shou said, tears stinging his eyes. Victory’s response was a memory of a girl saying the same. Their previous host’s final breath. The moment they’d decided, no more. They would lock himself away from the world forever, and then, finally, they would be free of this agony.

Before Shou knew it, he'd launched himself off the bed and was standing in front of Victory. He clutched their shoulders and stared into their eyes. “No, you— Victory, you can’t do this!” Shou shouted. “Yeah, I’m going to die, just like everyone else you’ve known. If not in battle, then of old age. And when I do, all of this would’ve been worth it, even the pain. Isn’t that the point of living?! To know that everything’s going to end someday, but still _caring_?!”

Victory slowly reached forward to touch Shou’s cheek. They drew their fingers through the wetness there. _Perhaps…you’re right,_ Victory said, very tentatively. But Shou could sense them giving it heavy thought, and a willingness to communicate. He threw himself forward, wrapping his arms tightly around Victory’s neck. Their hands lightly touched his back, and Shou let himself believe that everything would be alright, in the end.


End file.
